Syria only ‘weeks away’ from Bono charity single, warns UN


From – April 16, 2017 – SilentCircle – Uncategorized – Comments Off

As the world continues to reel from the latest harrowing revelations from Syria’s ongoing civil war, a fresh terror is now driving urgent efforts to find a lasting solution: the news U2 frontman Bono has ‘taken to the studio’ with the aim of producing a stirring ballad to highlight the suffering.

According to a UN report published this morning, Syria is now “just weeks away from a Bono charity single”, and opposing sides must “act with immediacy to prevent further unimaginable suffering”.

“The mere thought of [Bono] looking earnestly into the camera, pulling a pained expression and rhyming something with Aleppo should be enough to bring President Assad to the negotiations table immediately,” said UN secretary general Ban Ki Moon in a statement. “We desperately urge all parties to lay down their arms and work towards a viable peace plan to ensure whatever he’s recording never sees the light of day.”

BONO - Tax Cheat and all round twat.

BONO – Tax Cheat and all round twat.

Refugee camps across Lebanon have been put on high alert for the arrival of Bono, Bob Geldof and “probably Chris Martin” following rumours of a music video that will see them “crouching on a muddy floor while surrounded by smiling children in ragged clothes”.

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